Again I ask . .

Is it just me?

Am I being unreasonable?

Right now, as I type this, I am online with O. 

He is online with me also (obviously) as well as a German woman who he has apparently been talking to/with (I am unsure if this is somebody he has previously told me about or not) - and, definitely in a sexual way. 

I have no idea how I feel about this. We were sending dirty messages to each other when he interrupted to advise me that the German woman was being finicky about getting a full STI screen. 

Now .. my kneejerk reaction, (or is that my gut reaction? I am having problems differentiating between the two these days) was to be pissed off that he was talking to someone else at the same time that he was talking some sexy smack with me. My second reaction was just to be pissed in general that he was talking to her - with erotic intent - at all. 

He says that although she is 'handsome' (his word), she is rather vanilla and really, is only for he and I to play with and (I think) he has told her about me - at least he mentioned that she was wanting/willing for a F/F/M encounter. 

I am not sure I believe him about the only looking for me and him part. 

I am not convinced that he isn't completely ready to meet with the first woman who is willing to meet him. 

I have no idea how I feel about this - he has me all turned around so that I don't know the difference between unreasonable and being perfectly sane/reasonable anymore - this isn't good right?

Two nights ago he said not to worry about his prowling on POF as he wasn't actually 'looking for pussy' (he isn't normally so crude as to use 'pussy' - a word I despise) .. that he was only there for fun and entertainment - to see just how far/much the women there were willing to lie about themselves. He also said not to worry about losing him as he wasn't going anywhere. 

Again, I remain unconvinced. 

To add salt to injury, he asked me to contact her as his 'friend and/or lover' ..

I am not an expert on polyamorous relationships .. but I have done some research, and I did join a forum where I could ask questions - I also befriended a married (poly) male who answers all of my questions in great detail. 

The one thing that everyone seems to think is that you don't just introduce a new or potential sex partner as a fait accompli .. it just isn't done. And, being in sexual communication with another woman and THEN telling me afterwards .. well, that comes under that umbrella in my book. 

So, yet again, I am confused .. are we a partnership that is negotiating how and when we will have other lovers or, am I just one of a potential brood of women?

What do you do when you gut tells you one thing but your mind tells you another?

Stay tuned .. I have a feeling things are going to get interesting.